Hey, listen up. The spaghetti WILL hit the fan. I guarantee it. In the pursuit of anything worthwhile, adversity, setbacks, disappointment… in other words, RESISTANCE will attempt to rain on your parade.
Have you ever studied a battery? Every batter has a positive end and a negative end. You’ve never seen a battery with two positive or negative ends. Why? Because the juice of the battery – the life of the battery – occurs between the negative and the positive.
The same is true for life. There is no life without BOTH the positive and the negative. The challenge for most people is they don’t manage their emotions well when it comes to the negative. Actually, many don’t manage them well with the positive either – consider all the successful musicians and entertainers who didn’t manage success well… and wound up addicted to drugs and alcohol.
So here are 2 techniques you can use to stay calm, in control, and positive when the spaghetti hits the fan – HOW to make the best of a bad situation… HOW to grin and bear it… HOW to think positive when the negative tries to knock the wind out of your dreams and ambitions.
- Take your blinders off. Stop focusing entirely on the few challenges you have in life and re-focus on all that you have to be grateful for… your eyes work, you have an education, you have a roof over your head, food on the table… the list in almost endless. Every morning, as soon as you wake up, write down, in a Gratitude Journal, 3 things you have to be grateful for. Feel it – appreciate it. Then write THANK YOU 5 times next to each one. Then, during the day when the spaghetti hits the fan, focus on gratitude… and you’ll manage your challenges in a more constructive and productive manner.
- Ask Courageous Question. Socrates was right – the quality of the questions we ask on a regular basis determines the quality of answers we get. Four months after we were married… my wife was diagnosed with stage 3 aggressive breast cancer. We did NOT ask, “Why us God?” or “Hey God, is this the best wedding gift you could come up with?” But we did ask… “How do we raise the bar and be a hero to our family and friends if, God forbid, something like this happens to them?” By asking courageous questions, we battled and beat cancer, where today, some 13 years after being diagnosed, Ellen is a yoga teacher and enjoying optimal health. So here are 3 questions to remember – and to ask when the spaghetti hits the fan:
- What has to happen? (Example: What has to happen for me to land a better job and enjoy the process?)
- Do I know this to be true? (I am too old to find a new, good job… do I know this to be true?)
- Are my thoughts and actions serving me – making me happy. (If not – change your thinking – you’re not a rock).
When you manage your focus and ask higher quality, courageous questions, you’ll be in a much more empowered state of mind to meet your challenges head on – to resolve them successfully.